'Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.' - Mark Twain
i feel trapped inside my own mind, like people on the outside don’t understand, i feel like i’m going insane but i know that i am not, my mind is the only sane place and all around me is confusion and chaos, people tell me how i feel, they say that something is wrong with me, force me to try and see medical professionals that i don’t want to see. i am only truly happy when with one person and even that doesn’t fend the mood swings away, the dark cloud that spreads over my face, but you have your own life, your own problems and you never tell me them so i don’t want to burden you with mine, i don’t want you to associate sadness with me because i need you, if you weren’t here i’d break, i feel sane with you. i am scared of my own future, i’m scared it won’t go away but i don’t want pills and i don’t want to see someone, i don’t want to admit how weak i am, how much strength has just ebbed away from my body, i do not admit defeat so i will keep going until i break because i don’t know what else to do. i’d rather burn out than fade away but i think i’m doing both.
